Do you see what I see?

Self perception posits that folks develop attitudes by observing their behaviour and concluding what attitudes must have caused said behaviour. Folks decide on their own attitudes and feelings from watching themselves behave in particular situations. Self perception can be poison. Self Concept is a multi-dimensional construct that refers to one's perception of 'self' in relation to characteristics, eg. academics and nonacademics, sexuality and racial identity, et al. Self esteem being the evaluative element. Basically, if you think, therefore you am...

So, my point? I was watching an exhilarating new telly show with my beloved recently, in my pjs, in my bed hair & in my comfort. The lead actress is beautiful. To me. Her lips full, her clear green eyes intriguing, despite, or because of her lack of make up. I immediately felt inferior. I said to my beloved, "She's beautiful..." His response was, "Are you kidding me? You're way better looking than she is."

& you want to know something? He meant it. Researchers debate when self-concept development begins but agree on the importance of a person's life. & you guessed it, a parent's gender stereotypes and expectations impact children's understandings of themselves by approx age 3. No wonder we're fucked, right? I'm not so sure on that one, I speculate that around 7 or 8, development begins to depend upon abilities, interpretations & feedback from all those surrounding, & on into adult hood.

Our environment influences. A person's self-concept is influenced by behaviours & cognitive & emotional outcomes via academic achievements, happiness, anxiety, social integration and life satisfaction.

The message is simple: if we pamper those insecurities until they're bloated, abject superiors with the right of way in our lateralised cognitive processes, we're dog food.

Hearing his words, of course, after I melted some & felt love & mush, I reflected on the inevitable insecurities, the plague of inferiority, the relentless self-scrutiny we ladies dress ourselves in daily. How do so many strong, successful, attractive, but most of all intelligent, females continue to second guess when confronted with the picture of another whom we consider beautiful.

Am I so small in my thinking that I would consider my devoted partner would pat me on the head, kiss my cheek and see-you-round me with the bat of another beautiful eye? Sure, I've been mislead, I've been lied to, I've been broken, but that was then. Get over it.

Distance your negative self and bring forth your positive self.